The Parent Resource Depot

Question:
We have a 4 yr old son and a 2 yr old daughter. We love our kids with all our hearts and are raising them the best we know how. Our son has started backtalking us and getting really mad when we discipline him. If you try to tell him something he gets so angry, grits his teeth then goes to his room and punches his little punching bag we got him. After he gets it all out he will come and apologize to us for backtalking and things are better again. This usually happens a couple times a day. As for my daughter, I know kids go through the terrible 2s but I have never seen a child act the way she does. She is really high tempered and screams all the time. There are times that she is really calm one minute then the next is mad at the world. She has always been like this (she was a preemie and they say her attitude really help pull her through the rough times). She also bites, pinches, hits, etc. My ?? is are we bad parents? Is this normal? We want well grounded and respectful kids. Any advice
Well some of you are questioning what we do for discipline. We have took away toys, threw away toys, did timeouts, took away TV, spanked them (God Forbid me even saying that one!! I know I will get criticized for that one!!) Nothing has worked.

Realize. My kids are not like this most of the time. They just have their moments. I know kids are going to have times when they act out I just don’t know if it should be to this extreme. When others see my kids they think they are the most well behaved, polite kids they have ever met. They have manners and say yes ma’am and no sir. AND, compared to those kids on Nanny 911 and SuperNanny……my kids are little angels!!

As for how my husband and I act around them. We have had a couple of arguments around them but not many. I prefer to wait to have our “discussions” until they go to bed.
Thanks for all of your responses.

One thing I do need to input is, my daughter is 2 but is developmentally behind so she doesn’t have the understanding that a 2 year old usually does. She was extremely premature and still hasn’t “caught up” with others her age. So it is hard to know what the right discipline for her is. She is seeing a neurologist every 6 months and he is watching her behavior. I have tried to hold her firmly before when she is throwing these fits but she just gets MAD and I mean MAD! She will scream to the point of being soaking wet with sweat and throwing up. She does have some brain damage from being a preemie that the neuro says could contribute to her behavior. I just feel at such a loss. Her last couple of fits she has thrown I will get right up to her face and say in a firm voice “Stop”. That has helped but I don’t want her to feel scared of me or anything. I don’t sound mean, just firm. Hopefully this will help with her.
Well to the people who responded without being smartasses I really appreciate it.

As for you others who say to spank the kids, if you read my other comments then you will see I have spanked them. And I was wanting to feel like I wasn’t the only person out there with this problem. If you can sit there and say just spank the kids when they act like that then you either don’t have kids or are completely blinded when your kids act out! I know my kids aren’t the only ones who act like this and don’t appreciate all the people who have posted the same crap over and over again.

I have limits on spanking and you can get their attention without leaving marks on them. Other parents, be cautious when asking a question on here. These people will make you feel like you have the worst kids in the world!!!!